this morning in the lift, i saw a daddy carrying his 3 - 4 yr old daughter. her head on resting on her daddy's shoulder, from behind it looks like shes aslp. only when they exit the lift, i saw tt she was actually bright awake. looking really sleepy and lazy, sucking her pacifier.
reminds me of the days when i was younger, may same age as her, i pretend to be asleep on the bus so that my dad will piggyback me home.
every weekend, he will bring me to the science center, again and again, seeing the same things. if not, he will bring me to bukit batok to swim.
life was so simple and happy.
i look at the old man sitting on the couch beside my mom these days, noticed his frail body and white hair.
why cant i let them know i love them the way they love me?
why cant i be patient w them like how they were patient w me when i was younger?
sometimes there will be thoughts of them leaving me soon enuff. that thought always make my heart sinks, i will quickly brush away tt tot, cos i cant imagine how painful i will feel. remorse & regret.
i m scared, but i just don bother to remind myself day to day to talk to them, care about them or just being at home.
i m a much homely person these days, because of a lot of reasons. but i will just be in my room playing my my comp.
i stay up in the middle of the night worrying about my bf who doesnt go home, but not thinking about them whos not feeling well in just another room.
sigh.
i will constantly remind myself to talk to them nicely in the next 2 days.**
on another note, my new work is doing ok.
crunch period.
other than the workaholic boss of mine who give me last min work at 6 pm and expect me to haev no plans & stay OT till 10 pm. -_- otherwise, i have to come to work early. like 7 am.
Colleagues are nice, so far. so all's good. looking forward to my getaway & bonuses! :P
**
i find myself talking too much to myself these days. whenever i m troubled, i will sleep it away. unlike last time, i will text my gfs. nowadays its so frequent and small tt i dont bother to disturb others anymore.
