Merry xmas!
meeting sec sch loves in a few hrs for cookout but cannot slp =/
i have this love-hate relationship for xmas n new yr since many yrs ago.
i love it cos, its festive. gives me a v warm feeling. nice lightings..& xmas presents..
i hate it cos, i usually feel more lonely during festive seasons. friends will be bz w their own parties. i would love to organise one, but always afraid tt no one will turn up. lol. i hate how everything is more expensive. over crowded shopping centres..
so anyway, my xmas this yr was w little anticipation. but turned out well!
for once on xmas eve, i don have to work half day!
was supposed to catch ling for tea at HV, but she was late, and i had to do xmas grocery shopping so tt i can head to baby's place to help, so i only met her for awhile at Coffee club. But i was glad she decided to come along w me to grocery shop! saviour! i m a total noob without benji.
:(
bought my stuff and headed over to ben's. he was already preparing at 4 + pm.
menu for the evening wasnt very festive, but they were yummy. :)
chilli crab (meat), japanese pork curry by him. cream of mushroom, pasta salad, 100% fresh mango ice cream by yours truly.
absolutely loveeee the mango ice cream! so yummy! =)
home cooking can be expensive too.. total we spent abt 60 bucks for all the necessary ingredients. but of cos we have left over ingredients tt we can use again. its fun! but tiring. haha.
ended dinner at 8+. already felt like sleeping. he almost wanted to stay home for xmas eve~ poor me almost hadda go find kaelyn at TAB by myself. until i sulk and told him we have nv spent any xmas or nye together. even when we were dating in sec sch. with the exception of Millenium Swing. so he relented. hehe..
rched TAB at abt 1130pm. the countdown was super quiet. not quite what kae expected, but it was everything tt i expected. life band, not crowded. good for us! since we were both in nua mood.
had wanted to head home after the low profile countdown to xmas. but we couldnt really decide if we REALLY wanna go back or not. so we followed kaelyn to PLAY w genia & their friends, ade, david & jon.
nice music. :) not too crowded. but i think i didnt have enuff booze. so didnt really had fun. been drinking alot lesser lately. refusing drinks. tink i have been sober for months, except my bday night. left for home at 3 am. lucky us, no problem getting cab. :)
woke up on xmas day when i toss and turn to hug the bolster. he whisper 'Merry christmas' to me and continue to look at me sleeping. rare. hes been slping and waking up at the v normal hours and i m not used to him waking me up these days. lol.
brought me to WCP and treated me to a sumptuous meal @ Sukuraya before i headed over to Irene's for April Half gathering!
Miss the girls~ its a v chillout gathering w just the 4 of us. potluck. tv. korean boys. and of cos Mayday!!!
Xmas day well spent!
***
life's been good, other than me still not able to adapt to my "new" work team. basically i find it v hard to get along w them... nvm... nt gonna elab..
we fight alot lesser too. hes been more sensitive and in control of his emotions ever since the last incident.
but earlier this week, i got abit emotional abt my last break up again. once in awhile, tots of d will come back. esp tt night when i was at butter w ben. many flashbacks of my bday last yr, how he proposed and how things have changed ever since.
its not tt i m not happy w ben now. on the contrary, hes everything i look forward to. but perhaps because, i started another rship and him being nasty have given me a v good opportunity to just bury everything behind. i rmb all the bad things abt him and the rship.
now tt sm time have passed, and i look back, there were indeed many things he did for me, which are nice, whether or not the intention is abt loving me.
ling asked if i still hate him. i cannot answer her... it still upsets me a lil tinking abt hw things have turned out. but i rather not tink abt him at all. since we both have moved on and have other priorities.
i m sorry abt rubbing off the negative vibes to benji tho. :/
**
'we have a honeymoon period tt is nv gg to end. :)'
