♥ *+ OuR StoRy +*

♥ 20060331

My Simple Life ♥

In Remembrance of Our Love..

Its been a year..

This time last year, we were in love, then you left me..you left me.. and i let u go cos i knew i can never replace her in ur heart...

I was the happiest girl.. never, till now, been so crazy in love with anyone..

Our love, or rather, your ~~love~~ infatuation, lasted for a short one month..

This one month left a big impact on me.. i don think u even realise..

We were happy. so happy.

Then things started turning ugly when i grew emo n possessive.

Till now, not a single time i past by Milenia Walk without thinking of the times i spend waiting for you to knock off.

I couldnt study there anymore..

remember the precious time we spend w each other in front of the fountain?
remember the 6 movies we watched together?
remember the weekends u stayed at my place?
remmeber the nice food we always have?
remember that you insist on warm brownie and we can have 2 in a row?
remember u said we can still be friends?

I remember.

I remember everything we did, everything u said from the first day we met. i even remember the first thing and last thing u said to me.

We are still friends, but prob just Hi Bye friends. Not something that i expect we will become. Probably due to our own commitments now.

Saw u on Vday Eve with her. You looked so different now. She must be such a happy girl i feel, just like i m now...

I m sure u treats her well.. cos she must be one who has a place in ur heart.. and i was never near..

i just happen to be there.. when u needed companion.. and you mistook it for something else...

Its been a year..

i haven really gotten over the one month..

Its been a year..

our love died.

R.I.P 28.03.2005

and so it is... just like u say it should be.. life goes easy on me.... ..

most.. of the time..................

Note: Just ranting, no special feelings. Some reminicence of the past. I wish him happy =) and i will be happy too!

♥ My World My Life

12:16 AM

♥ 20060330

My Simple Life ♥

I m screwed.. its only a bout a month i have left to study for my exams...

I cant concentrate...... i m always tired..

i am gonna see doc to give me some pills probably to keep myself awake.. or go to the doc and tell him to give me MC so tt i can rest at home.........

Not enuff sleep.. work and school.. i simply hate this............

every morning i have to drag myself out of bed.. to work then sch then home.. so tired of such life...........................................................................................................................................

i don feel like seeig other pple.. even my friends.. but not as if they have been asking me out anyway~

The only thing i like now is to slp..or being w dear in our own world.. cos hes the only one i don care how he looks at me..

only one in the world tt will do anything to make me happi..

only one in the world tt doesnt mind how shagged i look..

only one in the world tt will just listen to me..

Imagine wat kinda life it will be .. without him............

i have prob gone berserk..

and i realised he always has been there..

but have i been there for him??

seems like i don know wat he is tinkning~ n i cant share his woes like i used to with my ex-s

whenever he wans to talk, be it family or career - i switched off

I m sorry. i m a bad gf.

♥ My World My Life

9:29 AM

♥ 20060328

My Simple Life ♥

Receive a very disturbing news last nite..

A good friend of mine officially broke up with his long time bf..

Sigh.

When i received e news from the guy, i was kinda worried abt my friend.. upon talking to her, realised shes fine n only i m relieved...

this problematic rship has dragged for v long time.. and this time round. the guy finally agreed to let her go... even though there was still love..

It doesnt feel good to see such this.. jsut becos of differences in characters, 2 person in love cant be together................................................

Anyway.. hope she will be fine soon.. as kailin says, this is the season of breaking up..

i will be studying at Esplanade Library during weekend.. this is an open invitation to all.. don say i nv jio u all liao..

needa study.. i m behind pace.. keep bumping ard w him ever since he came back... sigh..

better buck up n gonna set my priorities rite.. =)

♥ My World My Life

11:46 AM

♥ 20060327

My Simple Life ♥

I am saying this once.. and i hope u all remmeber it forever..

Your love could be the nicest thing that ever happen to me...

Nv wanted to tell pple how happy i m...never wanted to cos i was worried all these happiness will end up like bubbles..

Nv wanted to admit how important your love is to me..

Nv wanted to admit how Xin Fu u made me..

Nv wanted to admit how impt u are in my life...

although i always shout at u..
although i always throw my tantrum..
although i get angry at u for the slightest reasons.
although i like to abuse u physically..
although i wasnt devoted to u at some pt of time.
although at times i strayed, physically and mentally..

but u nv fail to forgive me..

I love you the way you accepted who i am ..

and I love the way you love me...

and i just wanna let u know that..

I love you too.. maybe not as much as you love me.. but yea..

its somewhere there.. =)

♥ My World My Life

3:43 PM

♥

My Simple Life ♥

SImple weekend after my dearest darling is back..

Darling was back on the 23rd.. skipped class n went to pick him up with the airport..with Hanzi's permission..

but anyway.. it was good seeing him alive n kicking again~

dinner at Swensen and headed home..

Next day, went to V8 for dinner..then walked around at Bugis..

Met IRN Ben and he was there picking a gift for his ex lover. lol.. wanted to catch a movie, but theres nth much tt we really wanted to watch. plus i was tired.. so we headed home..

He wasnt feeling well on the journey back.. he sent me home by train then he took cab back home..

and was admitted to the hospital the next day.

Nothing serious, just some traveller's sickness.. he was discharged on sat afternoon..

And he couldnt meet me up for Liquid room that very nite.. but was cancelled anyway..

While he was resting at home.. i decided to meet up with Bestie at Downtown east for some catching up.

Dreaded to go out... but i changed into my most casual outfit (shorts, tee, slippers) with my Ipod, Ez link and 50 bucks and headed to PR.. surprised that the trip was actually kinda short.. haha..

met her up and chill at one of the cafe to chill.. and chatted.. from 915 all the way till 11.. just talking.. haha..

"lucky bestie rene met mi up at downtown east for a little catch up and hanzi happened to be in the vincity too! but din meet up with her arh..

chat with bestie is prolly the best thing tt happened to mi over the weekend i guess! lol.. tho the tom yum wasnt tt great.. but the talk made me feel alot better.. thank you ah rene!" adapted from Gwenie's blog.

Lol.. me feel e same too.. although the part tt i have to drag myself out is really a chore.. but . yeah.. enjoy the walk. =)

Sunday..

had buffet lunch at Park Loyal Hotel.. my baby niece One Month Old lunchie..

the spread is damn good.. was my second time n its as good as e first.. the cheese oyster is yummY!!

Met w my dear at Suntec for NATAS after tt.. in the end, we went to 2 branded warehouse sales..

Good buy! good buy! i bought a Abercrombie Jacket at 30 bucks and i love it!!

dear also bought a v cool backpack at 10 bucks. A CK Tee at 20. Also bought Jasmine bday pressie!!

NATAS was too crowded, so we dropped the idea.. headed to Marina and bot Tickets for a damn lame movie which is really not worth mentioning.. haiz..

tried to kill time in between and we headed for the Library @ Esplanade.. woo.. nice place.. gonna study there.. its really a v nice environment..

after movie headed home..

Mommy bought a new DVC player! yea!!

♥ My World My Life

8:40 AM

♥ 20060323

My Simple Life ♥

A month just passed like that..

Initially it was hard..then slowly.. i started getting used to being alone..

Now that one month's time is up...

On this supposedly big day..

i don feel anything.. not excited nor looking forward...

Mery keeps telling me that its v normal.. tt i will feel this way.. cos.. hes like a stranger to me now.. since hes away for a month..

but wat i m afraid is.. wat if the feelings doesnt comes back???

I hope it will, my dear..

Unless i like someone else.. which is not possible.. cos i have been sucha good girl for the one whole month..

Even last nite.. when weiling called to jio me to mambo (which i have been thinking of going) i chose to sleep.. haha. i fell aslp on the bed w my audit notes..

anyway. great talkign to this girl.. haha.. usual bitching.. but thanks to her.. i went to see some threads in MSU forum.. and got to see some remarks the public left for Geraldine Loo, who qualified for Miss Singapore Universe 2006.

Nv understand how can a bimbo with soley figure and no looks and brains can qualify for MSU..

Hah.. but cant blame la. the standards this year is really really bad..

i m so happy that I have found another one who really hates GL.. HAHAH.. n i really enjoy the bitching..

BOO!! (for more on Bimbo Geraldine Loo, pls see above entry)

anyway.. back to topic..

wondering if i shld just skipped class n spend some time w him???

haiz..

maybe i m feeling this way becos of WH..

he just contacted me ytd and i felt so so sorry for him..

cant help, but again, keep blaming myself for leaving him when hes down and out.....

i just owe him too much........

♥ My World My Life

10:31 AM

♥ 20060319

My Simple Life ♥

tts me..

=(

i m so fat.. look at my arms..!!

and my cold sore on my chin made it worse!

Hair so messy.. need a cut........

Gonna put this pic on my wall paper.. so i can remind myself to work out my arms.. =(

♥ My World My Life

10:58 PM

♥

My Simple Life ♥

I spent the entire weekend recharging again.. nv touch my books ..

Haiz.. sad...suppose to study so tt when he comes back we can go n have fun!

but now.. -_-

Hes coming back in 4 days time.. die.. and i think i stop missing him..

-_-

my friends all said its v normal.. i m just starting to get used to my life now.. without him lo..

Sigh. i guess its gonna take me a bit of time to get used to someone back in my life~

I hope the change of behaviour wont make him think too much..

i just need sometime getting used to!

or maybe i don need to think too muchj.. scully i m fine after i see him leh.......... hee..

i hope............

Gonna finish a qn of Finance then heading to bed... *yawn..

Disney on ice is nice!

♥ My World My Life

10:20 PM

♥ 20060318

My Simple Life ♥

Just reach home from MOS event - CLEO's Top 50 most eligible bachelor!!!!!!!!

WEe!! so exciting!! not only becos i can see all those naked bodies of hunkies.. but its been sooooooooooo long tt i last club!!

hoho.

Went there w mery n perry n perry's friend..cos got free passes

Damn.. they were so late lo! =( waited outside MOS by myself..

Bryan v on clubbing kaki..despite so many times i flew his Jumbo, he still dare to come down.. i was on my way then suddenly tot of him so i msg him.. who noes he really came down alone!

LOl.. he looked rather sian to me.. but he keep saying hes not.. cos i m realyl not used to brinign a guy friend whom i don really know well to club w my friends..

anyway.. bump into Kailin there.. kinda expected she will be there but my hp no credit so i cldnt call out.. so qiao! bumped in to her and we were both happy to see each other!

E bachelors were SOOOOOOOoo cute............. their body so nice n their features .. GOsh..

i touched Shan!! haha.. nice..

But the 2 TCS actors i supported wasnt there.. so sian....................................................

Saw Dawn Yeo and ya.. not exactly super pretty but her nose is damn nice.. and damn fake.. lol..

Saw one of the Superstar top 8.. and damn! hes a gay!! wa so sian lo.. always supported him one... haiz..

Anyway.. i was stuck at Smoove most of the nite with Bryan alone.. so stupid.. so its too crowded and cant really stick together..and kailin n friends went home v early..

I think Bryan v weird one lo.. he doesnt mind clubbing just like 2 person or alone.. i felt its so weird.. esp like u club w a opposite sex friend.. its either u dance w each other or u dont.. then sometimes he will be more interested in wats happening around him, e.g Hot girls grinding then his mind will wander off.. then i will feel so stupid lo..

But he also v ke lian la.. it was his first time there but i made him leave early with me cos my legs were damn tired! Lol.. actually i kept asking him if he wanted to stay.. since he don mind clubbing alone..then he will ponder hard then he will say Yea.. i m going back w u..

-_-

diao..on the way back home he keep saying (in a jokng manner) that i shld have left him in the dance floor when i came out to meet mery.. diao.. i tot for a v long time then i decided to call him out lo.. also din wan to spoil his night ma..

then he kept bringing back e old scores last time! keep flyiung his Jumbo on wed nites.. lol..

On way back suddenly he ask if i m hungry.. then i realise both haven eat dinner so we headed for the delicious Punggol NasiLemak .. YUM! i nv eaten there before.. always wanted to but nv..

Had a filling suppe rthen we headed home.. so here i m, updating my blog entry abt the nite.. n going to slp now.. yawn..

♥ My World My Life

4:02 AM

♥ 20060317

My Simple Life ♥

I m starting to hate my job.

Bosses are v nice n understanding. Esp my CFO. probably becos i m just his son's age (heard his son is damn cute), so he always like to joke w me.. even if i made any mistake, he will remind me in a gentle manner.

Those closer friends should know, i will always have this "skin rot" on my chin once in a while.. i nv knew wat is it..

then i always tot i din keep my face clean enough.. the rotting will cause a layer of dark color hardened flakes on my chin.. v ugly.. and normally durin this time.. i wont go out..

Like i say, nv knew wats the cause.. until today Mr kwak (my cfo) asked me into his office.. i tot wat troubles i created this time.

then he ask me wat happen to my chin.. then i said i dunno..

then he told me.. i have gotten a "COld Sore" , medical term is call " Herpes" (i know it sounds serious, but its not). Its a genital virus, that once u got it , it keeps coming back when u are under stress .. (looks like i m really stressful, theres proof)

then he ask me.. exams issit? so stressed..

Lol.. hes v nice lo! ask me to go n see doctor n get the cream and it will be gone in days..

and i can charge it to the medical card. hee..

bosses are nice.. but on the other hand, colleagues are getting more n more jia lat..

a lot of "Little Men" around.. i must be more careful.....

♥ My World My Life

10:56 AM

♥ 20060315

My Simple Life ♥

I found myself crying at my work desk just now..

I felt so farked up..

farked up project. farked up wrk. farked up everything.

Pple is bullying me becos i kept quiet.. i kept quiet for almost everything..

u wana be irresponsible? so be it.

SOME PPLE ARE JUST PLAIN SELFISH N IRRESPONSIBLE. CANT SPARE A TOT FOR OTHERS OR PUT THEMSELVES IN OTHER PPLE'S SHOES.

Enuff is enuff.

not gonna trust those pple who let me down anymore.

Felt like talking to someone so much.. but when i look at my phone.. i have no idea who i can call....

felt liek the whole world is against me n i m in farking isolation.

sinking more and more into the dark.

feeling more n more depressed.

hoping my dear can come back soon.. so tt he can share my unhappiness.. or rather.. make me a happier person.. i miss him.. alot..

Thanks to bestie Gwen who called to check up on me. U rox.

Sorry din join u for the movie, tell me if its nice ok!

♥ My World My Life

5:29 PM

♥

My Simple Life ♥

I made it for my test.. got confidence of getting at least a credit.. probably a Di.. hehe..

i hope!

Haiz.. so no life recently.. ,my friends promised me to ask me out, clubbing, dating watever when ah doink is away.. but everyone seems to be busy w their own thing...haiz.. i felt so ke lian in this little lost world of mine..

Wat i wanna do:

I wanna give my hair a good cut and treatment. maybe some colour will be nice
I wanna swim
I wanna tan
I wanna shop, buy new clothes n new shoes!
I wanna travel
I wanna club (missing this one badly)
I wanna eat, seafood, western food. Been not having regular meals..
I wanna hang out and chat will late w my girlfriends. or guy friends

If u guys wanna do any of this. call me! will be free from now till end of april.. muack~

♥ My World My Life

8:29 AM

♥ 20060314

My Simple Life ♥

took off today....... supposed to study for my test.. but fark.. i kept sleeping or chattin on msn..

i lost all my motivation of study.....

just when i was trying concentrating after my nap at 11pm..

received this mms frm weihao.....

diao... -_-

he sent me his picture..

suddenly i m so so so not in the mood for anything..........

mixed feeling of guilt.. missing.. sadness..

can never return him enough..

guess the memories left of us will haunt me for the rest of my life...

♥ My World My Life

12:33 AM

♥ 20060312

My Simple Life ♥

Sigh.. sunday noon..

i haven touch on my finance tests...

hate this man..

doing my project but i had no idea wats going on..

been trying since hanzi sent me her final ans last nite..

kailin hasnt give me her part...........

i got no time to compile..................

hate this uncertainty...........

maybe i should just start on my finance revision n leave this proj aside...

♥ My World My Life

1:13 PM

♥ 20060311

My Simple Life ♥

Cant remember when is the last time i met up with Mery n Stelly..

Found them after Cafe Cartel after a long day of work.. seeing them makes everything feels better though..

as usual.. some catching up n gossiping...

but kinda sad cos most of the pple they talk abt are from Uni. so i couldn really blend into e conversation..

Hope both of them are doing fine esp in BGR.. *huggies*

Went to pick my mama from Marina, it was her first day at her new job.. it kinda pains me to see her slogging and apparently.. their colleagues are not v nice pple..

shes supposed to knock off at 9.. so i was there 15 mins earlier.. but she only able to leave at 9.40..

after tt she was complaining to me abt her colleagues n how tired her legs are haaving to stand the whole day..

haiz.. i raelly don wan to see her like this.. i m just useless la.. unable to give her a good life..

the tot of now dropping my job to concentrate on my studies is really luxurious..

Brought her back home then calvin asked if wanna have supper together..

i said fine.. cos i was lazy to go out w/o tpt..

just then jasmine called n ask if i wanna catch Munich w Gwen n her...

so me n calvin headed down to town.. wanted to pick her up.. but Tf was already at her place there to pick her.. so me n cal just went straight to town..

Waited for bestie Gwen at Bistro.. till all of us become stones.. haha..some chatting etc..

bestie finallly reach at 1.30 am.. it was late.. so we drop the inital plan of playin mj.. cos i can see Calvin is like half dead.. don wan him to get into accident on his way home...

i opt for home.. while bestie n jas decided to catch a late nite movie..

had a short 10 mins catch up with gwen then i decided to go..

next time perhaps? haha.. since both of us finsihing test on tues.. i wanna watch dorm!

"sometimes somethings u may think pple wont understand cos they cant relate.. but even if they can relate.. i m sure they are willin to lend a pair of listening ears.. esp ur friends.. =) "

dont think so much my dear girl.. go w the flow...

♥ My World My Life

4:56 PM

♥ 20060309

My Simple Life ♥

Haiz..

I m so bottled up..

Work n school.. projects n tests.....

sometimes. i just cry..no body there for me to talk to..

& i have to resort to doing my project during working hours.. when i have finish my co. 's work..

haven been eatin decent meals..

Cup noodles is all i had for past 2 day's lunch. sometimes i skip my dinner n a few pcs of crackers is my breakfast.......

I m waitin for my dear to come back...... so tt i can go eat w him...............................................................................

♥ My World My Life

2:18 PM

♥ 20060307

My Simple Life ♥

DInner with Cal at Bugis V8.. he came to picked me up after work.. but it took us almost 1 hour to reach bugis.. cos apparently this direction idiot lost his way again..

The food @ V8 is cheap and tastes good too!

anyway.. i insisted tt it was my treat =)

Drove a few rounds around Esplanade, blasting his loud loud techno, before we headed to MS to catch Wolf creek at 9.40 pm..

Initially we tot its gonna be boring.. and since theres no chinese subtitle, we had problem making out wat they were saying.. (the australlian slang).. but it got better towards the end..

It was a nice movie! kinda gross actually.. but the story line is good.. its based on a true story.. about how the tourists to Wolf Creek got kidnap by this psycho n how he tortured and kill them..

hmm..

theres less than 20 person in the cinema! so shiok!

me n cal chose one seat directly in the centre of the theatre .. even got space to rest our legs!

after movie i wanted to head hm.. but he suggested going to Changi for a spin.. i supported the idea..

as long as i m not the one driving! Lol..

The ride on ECp was nice.. as usual..=)

visit, (again) the OCH.. but on our way there i received a call from my dear..

haiz.. he met w an accident.. haiz.. n i m still so worried now.. cos i cant get him on his phone.. but during the short conversations he mentioned tt hes fine now..

I wish he can come back early.. n hopefully nothings gonna happen to him again..

couldnt talk nor laugh nor joke on the way back.. calvin tried to make me smile.. so he pass me a present he put under his seat..he said its for me..

was quite surprised.. hes so sweet...

made me feel better instantly.. but .. still couldnt stop worry abt my dear boy though..

haiz..

anyway.. its a ELLE wallet lo.. just nice.. i need a change of wallet..and its v nice i like it alot.. wonder if it costs alot? somemore its not special occassion.. hmm..

STOP SPOILING ME!! .. rides and presents n dinner..

hahaha

♥ My World My Life

1:38 PM

♥

My Simple Life ♥

wat i m most afraid of has happened..

he met w an accident.. a small one.. but its somehting tt will affect the rest of his life..

he called me to ask me if i will still wan him?

i was super confused.. but i told him YES.. i will stay w him..

cos i know..

i cant afford to lose this boy....

♥ My World My Life

1:24 AM

♥ 20060306

My Simple Life ♥

Just came back from Gracie's 21st bday chalet at PR!

hee..

its a v relaxing one day one nite stay..

Me bestie Gwenie (u stil my bestie!), hanzi n of cos the bday girl, GRACE TAN LITING!

Muacks..!

BBQ on sat nite .. after tt mahjong.. then noon went to the beach for some fresh breeze! so nice..

Hee..

meeting calvin for movie tml.. my first dinner at Secret Garden!@

shout out to mery: hope u are fine my dear girl.. anything pls call me.. no worries ya,.

♥ My World My Life

12:15 AM

♥ 20060304

My Simple Life ♥

I had a wonderful nite.. thanks to Calvin..

Was supposed to watch Brokeback mountain w JQ.. but there was some issues regarding the seats and my working time.. so ya.. i din went to watch w him..

ASked Calvin out instead.. its been half a year since i last saw him..

Figured tt it might be better to go out w him cos more relaxing n more convenient..

He booked e ticket for BBM at 940.. PS..and picked me up at my place at 920..

haha.. was almost late..

I m so happy to test sit his new car! wow.. spacious n cool.. but stil v ah beng.. and its still RED..

haha.. cos white is out of stock.. LOl..

Anyway.. as everyone was telling me how super nice BBM is.. i was desperate to watch it..

In the end.. i din find it as amazing as wat others have put it.. its just w a v interesting storyline but the show is kinda draggy..

But nevertheless.. its my first R21 movie.. it is so for him too..

Was fascinated by all the "disturbing scenes" in the movie.. haha..

Was supposed to join his friends for Zouk.. but i din really felt like socialising so i told him he can go ahead without me..

However, he chose to Fly his Jumbo Jet and go for supper with me at this dessert shop behind Zouk..so nice of him!

The dessert shop "Tang Shui", in Hk means dessert..

Hmm.. its kinda like a Hong Kong style dessert shop.. don be surprised to find 300 over dishes in the Menu.. Cool~

I wasnt hungry so i just wanna try somethign special..

The Mango & Prawn Roll is damn nice la~! and i was brave enough to try the Cuppucino Coke.. lol..imagine Coke with coffee and they actually sell tt..

The prawn roll with mango.. super nice..

The Cuppucino Coke.. looks and taste weird.

Sat down v long at the place as i was a v nice place to chill.. had a nice chat n just enjoying each other's company..left slightly after 1..

As usual, he took ECP to send me home..(which is not the shortest route back) cos he knows i like the scenery there..

Man, i miss those kinda feelings to be drivin around aimlessly near the sea.. n i m glad the ride always makes me feel happier...

the super cute n innocent looking tiger being neglected at the side of the car.. haha..

Almost reaching hm and i blurted that the ride wasnt enough.. haha.. so he said i should hav etold him earlier so tt we could have drove around at town or smth..then he suggested goin for a spin around my area as well as look for the Pertrol station..

He tried to scare me with his typical ghost talk la.. then we ended up at this v ulu sami dead end .. yucks..so eerie..

Knew he was tired so i told him to drop e idea of driving to Jurong for fun so he sent me back home..

So here i am.. 3.20 am sitting in front of the com.. trying to recall wat happened for the nite..

I m feeling much better now~ Thanks Cal..

♥ My World My Life

3:05 AM

♥ 20060302

My Simple Life ♥

last entry regarding this issue...

I tot abt wat u said on my way to school.

and hey, i realised the word MALIGN is too strong to use leh..

MALIGN means i accused u n want u to believe something u din do..

But i didnt.. its just my feelings ma..u don have to agree with wat i think ..

i also dunno say wat liao..

I read thru ur blog liao..

maybe its true..

maybe i m too vulnerable at this pt of time..maybe...

nevertheless..

i still look forward to see u on sat to catch up ya~

=)

♥ My World My Life

11:28 PM

♥

My Simple Life ♥

u all told me to talk to her nicely..

i did..

u all told me to let her know how i felt ..

i did..

in a mean way.. in a gentle way.. in a angry way...

i did..

I beat around the bush.. i told her straightforwarded..

But i din get any response..

i dunno how can i make her understand...

another super ultra long entry in my blog???

It didnt work the last time i did tt...

i wan her to know tt i m not trying to push blames..

neither m i trying to gain sympathy when my bf is gotta town..

i just wish she can be more sensitive to my feelings..

her so-called best friend..

♥ My World My Life

3:27 PM